You May Find A Bed

 

There is no convenient time to break your leg 
There is no convenient time to find your soul 
There is no convenient time to submit to force 
There is no convenient time to starve 
There is no convenient time to have a child 
There is no convenient time to lose your will 
There is no convenient time to have a flat tyre  

from You May Find A Bed, by Skeleton Crew

I had hoped, by now, to be selling a book called King Arthur vs Devil Kitteh. But, as is the course of things, obstacles have been encountered, delays endured, and it’s still a work-in-progress. But I find myself facing a new dilemma: once it is ready, when and how do I launch it? 

My intention had always been to run a Kickstarter: I’ve had great success with the previous two that I’ve run. But I'd wanted the Kickstarter to complete at a time which means I can deliver the book around about this time of year, in time for Christmas.

I really don’t want to wait another year before launching the book; but I now have more significant concerns than that: will anybody be able to afford it? 

Like I said, my previous two Kickstarters have been very succesful. But they have been for relatively cheap zines, they have piggy-backed off well-supported community games jams, have been moderately cheap to produce (unlike the properly bound hardback picture-book I have in mind for King Arthur) and, most importantly, were released when “spending money” was still a thing.

Sure, for many people around the world, it still is. But quite specifically here, now, in the UK, things seem to have changed rapidly for the worse. Fuel and food prices have gone up astronomically, and the government which has overseen this country’s decline over the last 12 years seem determined to push us into another round of “austerity” (AKA bubble-up economics). Friends in retail tell me that they’re turning over 20% of what they did this time last year. When is a good time to launch a £20 book which many, I know, will love but, let’s be honest, nobody really needs?

I don’t have an answer. All suggestions gratefully received.

Meanwhile, I flddle in my hilltop home as Rome slowly burns. I’ve been tinkering with AI “art” and, my god, it’s addictive. While I’m extremely sensitive to the concerns of artists who stand to lose work, wow, aren't these beautiful? (I want to stick some on T-shirts and sell them, but… ethics, damn it).

Back to King Arthur: while my brain takes its time over mulling a release date, you’d be doing me a great favour if you signed up to be notified when the Kickstarter starts kicking, you can do so here. Also, why not sign up for my email newsletter using the form below - one day, I may even send out an email.

Kaverns & Kittens

COMING SOON FROM PEAKRILL PRESS...

Writer Mister Daniel Nathan Sumption and Illustrator Master Maximillian Benjamin Hartley present: KING ARTHUR vs. DEVIL KITTEH, a modern retelling of the medieval story of good King Arthur, and of how he killed a giant cat (how very brave of him!)

This is a genuine medieval tale, and it's about the daftest thing we've read in a long time. We're almost certain that large parts of the film Monty Python and the Holy Grail were based upon it.  It was first written down (in French) before the year 1250 CE, when it appeared within "The Old French Vulgate Cycle", and was translated into English as part of what is now know as "The Prose Merlin" around 1450 CE. Since then, it's become remarkably obscure (Monty Python aside), and we feel that its time it was unearthed again. And so, we're turning it into a beautiful illustrated book.

Arthur and Merlin unite Albion

Like we said, it's the story of Arthur, Albion's legendary king, killing a whopping great cat (a kitten, even!) on the advice of his wizard Merlin. There's a lot more to it than that but, I mean, do you really need to know more. Of course it includes the Devil Kitteh Origin Story, there's also the tale of the time Arthur decided to become Roman Emperor, trust us, there's plenty for you to sink your feline teeth into.

Arthur and Merlin arrive in Europe

We want to make a book as barmy and dark as the original tale. Inspired by kids books of the 1970s, with their weird spooky vibe and folk-artish illustrations, it will be a tale for children, adults, and immortals alike. Taking inspiration from Gawain and the Green Knight, Jabberwocky, The Goodies vs. Kitten Kong, and obviously Monty Python, we'll weave a good tale that will wow the world.

Of course, for fans of tabletop roleplaying games, we will wow you with the Stats of the Cat, a playable monster with skills and weaknesses the likes of which you've never seen before. Add Devil Kitteh to your game of D&D or Into The Odd, and your players will never complain about losing a limb ever again.

Who knows, perhaps one day we will make it a movie. One that wears its sources a little bit more up-front than that Holy Grail of 70s' cinema. 

To be kept up-to-date on the progress of this project, please sign up at the Kickstarter site for the book. This does not in any way commit you to backing it or buying a copy when it launches, it's just the best way for us to let you know when it's ready to launch.

Initial concept sketches

Interview with Write Radio

Write Radio

I was interviewed recently for Write Radio on Sheffield Live. I talked to host Jane Armstrong about writing for roleplaying games, and how it differs from the sort of short story writing I'd been doing before. We also talk about the differences between TTRPGs now vs. those I grew up with in the 80s, and about my various current projects: Mostly Harmless Meetings, King Arthur vs. Devil Kitteh, and Learning to Draw Trees.

Here is the interview. I've added comments at various points to indicate which topics we talk about: 

dansumption · Write Radio interview with Dan Sumption - 18th February 2022 - Sheffield Live

The Book of Horkos

Your author and the Book of Horkos

I wrote recently here about real-world magic. Bear with me skeptics (feel free to call it something more sciency if you prefer: perhaps "psychology" or "human nature" or "nudge theory"), for here is another powerful school of magic in the real world: the spell that is cast by the perilous oath.

Some years ago, Daisy Eris Campbell came up with the idea of the Book of Horkos. Horkos was an ancient Greek demigod responsible for punishing oath-breakers. Horkos was (is?) the son of Eris, goddess of chaos - and so it's appropriate that her namesake should have birthed this book. The Book is a huge leather-bound tome in which, every six months, on Horkos Day (23rd January and 23rd July), pledgers - or Horkosians, as we call ourselves - write down their intentions for the next six months.

(Incidentally, flip the book over and open it from the other side and you'll find that it originated as the memorial book from the funeral of Daisy's dad Ken Campbell. Which makes it all the more astounding when you discover what we may one day have to do with it...)

It's all very well to make a pledge but we can, and do, break promises all the time. Modern times lack a Horkos to impose the most severe of punishments on those who go back on their word. But in his book, we hold his spirit sacred, and the retribution for breaking any pledge within it is terrifying.

Six months after pledges have been made, if any one person who wrote in the book has failed to do what they promised, the book must be burnt and all those within suffer the punishment of Horkos. An early version of the book did meet this fate, but the current incarnation has been going strong for some six years and over 100 pledges. This is helped, no doubt, by the fact that all of those pledging need to agree to each and every pledge, resulting in the emergence of "Horkosian lawyers", who study very carefully the pledges made, and negotiate the wording to keep each promise specific and achievable.

Creative people are notoriously flaky. We change our minds, suffer fits of doubt, fail to get out of bed in the morning... we excel in finding excuses to do anything rather than do the work. The Book of Horkos is a solution to that problem. Do the work... or something cosmically terrible will happen. You'll not just be letting yourself down, you'll be letting your fellow Horkosians down. Hell, you'll be letting the universe down.

And it's been incredibly effective, Not one failed pledge out of the many made so far. Artworks have been birthed: books, plays, paintings, music and games; new skills learnt, new businesses launched, new life paths undertaken. Mrs Death Misses Death, the astounding and bestselling novel by Salena Godden, started life as a Horkos pledge.

I have completed four pledges myself in the past: to write twelve short stories; learn to sing and play the guitar at the same time; write a D&D adventure; and commit to heart the first of TS Eliot's Four Quartets, Burnt Norton.

Last night, I made my 5th pledge, and here it is:

I, Dan Sumption, shall write an alliterative poem "King Arthur vs Devil Kitteh" based upon the story in the Prose Merlin. The poem shall tell of

- How Merlin and Arthur travelled to the Alps

- How a ferocious cat ended up living in the Alps

- How Arthur battled and slew the cat

 The power of Horkos is such that this morning I leapt out of bed at 4:30am and knocked together a first draft of the middle part of the tale, "how a ferocious cat ended up living in the Alps". Here it is:

Sometime ago a fisher came to fish the lake

Which lies beyond Lausanne in lofty Alpine lands.

Before he cast his kit and clobber, first he prayed;

Communed with christ and promised him the first fish caught

Quite soon he caught his first fat fish, my it was big!

It's worth was 30 shillings, so he said "OK

The Lord can wait a little while, he'll have the next."

But when the next was netted it was larger still

"God will abide" he said "the third he'll have for sure",

And cast his net once more, and once more reeled it in.

He had to heave and haul for it was heavier still,

But there inside, instead of fish, he'd caught a cat

A king sized kitten came out of the net and cried,

A mighty mewl that made the mountains boom and quake.

At this the fisher soon forgot the vow he'd sworn

And said "this kitteh could soon rid my house and home

From mice and rats that have beset my family,

And forced them to feed frugally and miss their meals."

But once the kitten came inside his house it turned

And killed his wife and children and consumed them whole,

Then sauntered off into the mountains past the lake.

From then until this time the kitten terrorised

And ruled the region, driving everybody out,

Or killing those who were too slow to steal away.

So, we should ride and rid the region of this threat

For t'would be knightly. Plus, it's on our route to Rome.

The completed poem, "King Arthur vs. Devil Kitteh", will be published later this year as an illustrated book, subject to a successful crowdfunder.

The Book of Horkos is special. But it's not special. Anyone can create a similar ritual for themselves. Just follow the rules above, or adapt to your own circumstances. But be sure to keep it perilous!

Future Peakrill Projects

Although I’m now full-steam ahead working on Mostly Harmless Meetings, I’ve also been thinking about future projects. The success of my SideQuest project has given me the confidence and inspiration to devote a large amount of my time to publishing my work (regular visitors may notice that the title and design of this blog have changed to reflect this).

At the beginning of 2021, friends of mine at Liverpool Arts Lab launched a monthly magazine called Bodge. A number of us “claimed” pages in the magazine, and were then each expected to produce a page per month, containing anything we wanted to put on it. My page was called “learning to draw trees”, and was exactly that. One tree per month, with no expectations other than to see how much my drawing (and looking, and appreciation of trees) progressed over the course of a year. It went far better than I’d ever imagined, and I’m now thinking of adding “professional tree illustrator” to my CV. This month’s tree is still under wraps, and will be the cover of the final Bodge (due out on 23rd December) but here are my first tree from January, and my November tree (ink smears and all: imperfections are very much a part of the learning process):

January...

...November

For February’s ZineQuest I will be making a Learning to Draw Trees zine, containing all of my tree drawings from 2021 (plus a few extras), some thoughts and insight into the process, plus (to keep the project gaming-adjacent) the rules for the game “You Are a Tree”, kindly donated by Côme Martin.

After that, I will produce an illustrated hardback adaptation of one of the earliest stories of King Arthur, which I call King Arthur and the Deville Kitteh. This features in a 15th Century English text, The Prose Merlin, translated from a 13th Century French source. It tells the story of how Arthur defeated a terrifying kitten. I’m not making this up.

I firmly believe that this tale was the inspiration behind at least two scenes the film Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I’m adpting it as an alliterative poem, in the style of Gawain and the Green Knight, but with added Monty Python and Lewis Carroll references. Because it feels like they belong there. I’ll see if I can’t squeeze some Edward Lear in there too.

Spoiler alert

This is a pretty big undertaking, and I don’t envisage it seeing the light of day before Summer 2022 at the very earliest.  But I’ve made some first steps...

Adapting middle English into modern-ish English

Next up will be a zine full of (very) minor gods - gods so minor that they may not have any worshippers - complete with backstories and stats for RPGs. This project is inspired by Terry Pratchett's book Small Gods, and the gods will be generated by my Twitter bot Deity Galaxy.

I’m also thinking of doing another gaming zine, insired by the Combat system of Chris McDowall’s games Electric Basionland and Into The Odd. Here is an early impression of the cover.

Trauma - cover concept

Finally, a while back I posted the first installment of a Mörk Borg adventure, Ship of Theseus. It’s taken me longer than planned to get the second part up, but a large part of the rest of the adventure is already written. At some point I plan on producing a print version of that too.

A few people have asked whether Mostly Harmless Meetings will be available to purchase after the Kickstarter. Absolutely! Obviously I will be making sure that all of my KickStarter backers get their rewards first, but once that’s all done and dusted then I’ll set up an online shop to sell the remainder. I envisage it costing around £10 for the zine, or £5 for the PDF version, though I will have to do some Big Sums before I can confirm that.

In the meantime, back to work on  Mostly Harmless Meetings…

Backgrounds & decorations for Mostly Harmless Meetings

Encounter titles for Mostly Harmless Meetings